Good Riddance, or, A Decade in Review (2010 - 2019)

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Greetings cyberpunks: welcome to the future. Boldly do we leave behind 2019 and thus surpass the futures depicted in Blade Runner and Akira. Another decade bites the dust - the first full decade that this blog has seen, as it was started in 2009 - and what a decade (though I did 'review' the Noughties...). So, the Twenty-Tens, encompassing 2010 - 2019, and what can you really say. Well firstly, is Twenty-Tens really the best we could come up with? What was wrong with the Tens? Or does that remind us too much of the preferred age of Jeffrey Epstein's victims?

If we are being completely honest, whatever good things occurred in this decade (the Large Hadron Collider, photographing a black hole, advances in LGBT rights) will be overshadowed by the  world's slow descent into an unending rightwing nightmare. I suppose the popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey should have prepared us for the public's capacity for pain and bondage, but fuck me if we don't keep voting in complete bastards. And by doing so implicitly support locking children in cages, building walls, and deporting people from a country they have lived in their entire life.

Trump. Cameron May Johnson. Orbán. Bolsonaro. Rouhani. Jong-un. Captains on a stagnant sea of hate and anger. The latter half of the Twenty-Tens has been one long international dick swinging contest (face it, Theresa May had the biggest dick of them all, it just didn't work). They've got their limp, putrid dicks in hand and helicoptering them about whilst stomping on the faces of their ever-grateful people, who caw "Get Brexit done" and "Make America great again". All the while the tech companies watch all, rubbing themselves silly as they pick the virtual bones clean.

Only everything is melting cause its fucking 50 degrees outside, Australia is reenacting Dante's Inferno, and it's getting hotter cause we've burnt all the trees down and still we keep shovelling in the fucking coal into a rotten fucking system. And yet the cycle continues, the tech companies extend their nebulous reach so that you can be sold more crap destined for a landfill, to poison the planet further, and the politicians are there to protect these people.

And you try to tear yourself away from the horrifying display, but you can't even go to the fucking pub without some fucking virgin (of the white or Islamic variety) fucking blowing you up or gunning you down. No wonder the Truth pulled a Michael Hutchence and hung itself in a closet whilst wanking.

The entire decade from a UK perspective has seen austerity, creeping fascism, and snivelling subservience become the norm. Brexit is only the rancid little cherry on top of that maggoty cake. The two parts of the last ten years which really sum up how fucked we are, are the UK government's mantra: "We're all in this together", and the image of sweaty Prince Andrew on that dance floor. Really, that combined conjures some truly grotesque Society-style imagery.

So here's your not so cyberpunk future: oppressive governments, environmental destruction, and hacker warfare, sure, but at least you can find glorious HD photos of people's toast on Instagram. Complete with #liveyourbestlife hashtags.

My picks of the Twenty-Tens:




Favourite Games:

  1.  Dark Souls Series
  2.  The Witcher 3
  3.  Hotline Miami
  4.  DOOM (2016)
  5.  Amnesia
  6.  Breath of the Wild
  7.  Crusader Kings II
  8.  Papers Please
  9.  Fallout: New Vegas
  10.  The Evil Within
Honourable Table-Top Mention: Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition

Favourite Films:

  1.  Joker
  2.  Dredd
  3.  The Witch
  4.  Evil Dead (2013)
  5.  The Irishman 
  6.  Mad Max: Fury Road
  7.  It Follows
  8.  Annihilation
  9.  Blade Runner 2049
  10.  Infinity War / Endgame

Favourite Fascist States: 
  1.  Brazil
  2.  Hungry
  3.  United States of America

Countries That Were Made Great Again:

  1.  Denmark
  2.  Portugal

People Who Didn't Kill Themselves:

  1. Jeffrey Epstein


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