Back when video games were nothing but coloured squares and lines and porn was something you had to really hunt for in the bushes near train lines, kids had to learn to read if they wanted to use their imagination.
Enter Steve Jackson, co-founder of Games Workshop (you know, that company for nerds) and co-author of the Fighting Fantasy book series. He and his compadre, Ian Livingstone have written dozens of Choose You Own Adventure books, or ‘gamebooks’ and they were immensely popular in the 1980’s and are still being reprinted today (although only Livingstone got a CBE for their efforts). While the majority of these books were high fantasy, they occasionally delved into other arenas. In 1984 they released House of Hell- a contemporary gothic horror where you, as a hero with about as much freedom of choice as Fritzl’s daughter, trek through a haunted house.
All you need to ‘play’ this book is a pen, paper, rubber, and a pair of dice. Or you can sack that off and choose to win every fight and pass every test you like, because Steve Jackson isn’t exactly going to come to your house and stop you, is he? The mechanics are the standard affair of the Fighting Fantasy series, but with one addition. A ‘fear’ metre. So that means you can actually be scared to death. It’s so shit-your-pants-scary that you do a Shaun Hutson and die whilst soiling yourself.
As you venture through the mansion, flicking through pages, turning to 267, then to 43, then deciding if you want to go to either 124, or 3, only to wind up dead, you’ll see that the book is littered with small pictures separating the sections. Skulls, voodoo dolls full of nails, ritual knives and grimoires. They help add to the sense of classic, Hammer-like, horror. Of course the artwork in the books really help too. The larger pieces each portray a section of the story, showing you what’s in store and letting your imagination run with what might happen next, providing you take the right turns. It’s an effective technique, acting like a trailer for the story. Here are some choice images.
A trek through a big haunted house wouldn’t be complete without meeting a toff in a dressing gown, and House of Hell delivers with the Earl of Drumer. He waffles on a bit and then later, sets his butler on you. If you didn’t know he’d turn out be evil by this point, then more fool you.
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I’m not a baddie,
honest. Tell him, Jeeves.
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It’s also worth noting that actually passing through this book is incredibly difficult- much harder than the usual FF foray, and it's all because of that Fear metre. With such a low cap and the fact that almost everything serves to shit you up, you aren’t in the house very long before you’re reduced to a quivering wreck. So much so, I’ve never made it through the whole thing. It always gets to a point where I’m so terrified by actual monsters that seeing something like a window blowing open kickstarts a heart attack. I picture my character basically screaming like Tom Atkins at the end of Halloween 3, then dropping dead like Michael Corleone in Godfather 3.
Even though this particular book from the 50+ original series is still one of the 10 that are still in print, you’ll be hard-pressed to find it in shops. Fortunately, that’s why the heathen gods invented eBay. There are loads of copies on there, but the newer additions have newer, toned-down artwork. The original was like Fright Night meets Bloodborne. The newer ones look like a mid-00’s CGI remake, or the cover to a Goosebumps knock-off,
Also remember, this book was for kids, so even considering the subject matter, it’s perfectly suitable. Unless of course you’re one of those parents who let your 9 year old watch Saw then took to Facebook to complain about the directors/studio when they got nightmares. Then just go back to breast-feeding the poor bastard instead.
Also remember, this book was for kids, so even considering the subject matter, it’s perfectly suitable. Unless of course you’re one of those parents who let your 9 year old watch Saw then took to Facebook to complain about the directors/studio when they got nightmares. Then just go back to breast-feeding the poor bastard instead.
Enjoyed this piece? Then 'like' The Crusades of A Critic on Facebook. Sam also has a Tech Noir novel, 'An Inside Joke', which can currently be viewed here; his first novella 'Iron Country' is available to buy here; a horror short story, 'We Must Never Found Out', published here; and finally, another short horror story 'Eagal' available to buy here. Phew.
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